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What is a gay Otter?

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Otters are adorable. They’re furry, they hold hands, and they get barebacked at The Eagle.

Gay otters are an imperative part of the gay ecosystem. Using our favorite rock, we’re going to crack into everything you need to know about our furry (but not ‘a furry’) friends.

If like a confused, yet well-intentioned, Jewish mother at an uncomfortable dinner, you’re wondering “what is an otter?” we got you covered. Otters are typically thin or somewhat muscular gay men with hairy chests and facial hair. While some otters shave their beards, it is imperative one keeps their body hair so as not to veer into twink or twunk territory. 

The term is generally understood as an offshoot from gay bears. The gay bear first caught on as a label in the 1970’s, specifically among the San Francisco gay scene to describe larger hairier gay men. It makes perfect sense, because in nature a bear is a lot like a bigger otter, only an animal bear might kill you. Open the schools, we need more gay zoologists. 

As the bear scene emerged, so too did the need to categorize oneself even further. If a man has body hair, but not enough bulk surely they were not a bear. If said man were a young bear, then the title ‘cub’ may be appropriate. However, an otter’s lithe frame and thicket of body hair defy those categorizations. Hence otters were born to populate our Scruff feeds.

If you are still struggling to conjure an otter in your mind take Cheyenne Jackson as an example. While he is certainly muscular for an otter, he fits the build well. Other otters of note are Milk from RuPaul’s Drag Race and Russel Tovey.

Otter is so popularized that in the 8th season of It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia Dee Reynolds explained what otters are to her father. This interaction nails the otter’s natural propensity for cunning and swiftness. It’s especially funny considering Charlie Day would make a fantastic otter.

Otters are fairly easy to find out in the wild. They’re litheness gives them an edge in gay sports leagues, so you can find them dominating twinks on softball, dodgeball, and soccer teams all over. To maintain their otter boy type they frequent high-end gyms (or at least the steam rooms) like Equinox.You can easily attract one by wafting the scent from a vodka soda at almost any gay bar in a metropolitan city. 

Otters are easy to spot at pop concerts as well, with their height and facial hair clearly distinguishing themselves from an audience otherwise composed of teenage girls. Some are even featured in viral proposal videos. Beware, they will elbow a child to get closer to Taylor Swift

We’ve covered more than Zoobooks ever could, or would. Now that you know otters, feel welcomed to approach. They are a usually friendly bunch just searching for the right beard oil and leather harness. Put some on your hand, and rub it into their magnificent scruff. They’re sure to woof for you, as that is their native tongue.

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